The nature of love is one of the most complex things to comprehend. One of my favorite quotes by Bruce Lee is: "If one loves, one need not have an ideology of love." Instead, love--true love--is a state or condition of being wherein the activities of the self have ceased. And in order to experience this state, an understanding of the workings of the self in all of its many varieties of consciousness is required.
You must think of love as a mutual experience of the body and the mind. When you love you must believe on one level that there is something constant about the body (physical constant) and that this physical constant is inherently and intrinsically enduring and tightly "connected" to what you perceive to be the identity of the person you love or even the object you love.
However, we do change or better said...we are change, as it is our ability to change with the change. Bruce Lee referred to this as "the changeless state." And in order to have success in the people and things you love you must have its experience transcend your physical body, and in order for love to evolve, you must experience the powerful emotional state as well.
In the case, that the emotion of love is not present, a state of not being able to change with change results in a changed state--which will lead to "growing apart." We must allow things in our life to evolve in its natural process, which will bring a truly wonderful experience. We must often remind ourselves not to possess or cling to the physical world.
As I mentioned in the past, the physical world is itself illusory, you're engaging in non-reality-based behavior, and this will set you up for failure. But instead if your experience of love can allow you to "let go" by not clinging to it, you will find that your relationships, goals, everyday activities will not only become more interesting, but will grow into a very strong unity of body, mind, and spirit.
Love can only exist in an environment that is free of ego--where one has forgotten oneself. To Bruce Lee, one did not have or possess "love" but rather lived the emotion in the present to the fullest possible degree and reveled in the experience of it. When love surrounds you, it becomes a tremendous physical, mental, and spiritual experience. "Love is like a friendship caught on fire.In the beginning, a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep burning and unquenchable."-Bruce Lee
You must value happiness and know that happiness in relationships, family, workplace, everyday activities should be derived, not from a whirlwind that involves an extreme emotional state, but from a more balanced relationship/behavior...remember that true Yin/Yang is expressed through temperance and moderation--not by running to extremes. "Nothing can be secured by extremes...only sober moderation lasts, and that persists through all time. Only the mid-part of anything is preserved because the pendulum (of life) must have balance, and the mid-part is the balance," says Lee.
So I leave you with this thought...allow life to live through you and remember that to get the most out of life lies simply in your decision to live your life with the principle of balance and to learn to cooperate with the natural patterns of our world. And most importantly, let your career, relationships, and daily activities be harmonious expressions of who you truly are.
Little, J. The Warrior Within. 1996. Pgs. 64-66.
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